Rowing on the Surface vs. Diving into Spirit: Trusting the Call of the Deep
But I resisted.
Then, in the distance, I saw her… Yemaya, radiant under the moonlight. She dove gracefully into the ocean, her tail flashing, and swam deeper and deeper until she disappeared. I woke up with the same lingering feeling I often have when she appears in my dreams: I disappointed her by refusing to reach for the water.
Living on the Surface
That dream revealed something profound about my own spiritual walk. Many of us row on the surface of our lives — we work hard, keep moving forward, and stay in control. But we rarely dare to stop and actually touch the waters of Spirit.
The water represents my more profound connection with the Divine Feminine and African spirituality. I have long honored my ancestors and the Seven African Powers quietly while preaching publicly about love, peace, and harmony. In truth, I’ve been rowing, staying close enough to feel Spirit’s presence, but afraid to immerse myself in it.
Fear has been my oar — fear of losing control, fear of misinterpretation, fear of what waits beneath the surface.
The Call of the Ocean
Yet Spirit doesn’t stop calling. Yemaya keeps showing up in my dreams because she knows the ocean is not here to destroy me — it’s here to cleanse, protect, and rebirth me. The dark water that frightens me also holds the healing and depth I seek.
Maybe you’ve felt the same pull in your own life. That tug-of-war between safety and surrender. Between rowing harder and finally letting yourself dive.
The truth is, the divine doesn’t force itself on us. Yemaya didn’t grab my hand and pull me in. She simply appeared and waited for me to choose. Spirit invites, but it’s always up to us whether we trust enough to go deeper.
Reconciling Faith and Fear
As a minister, I’ve struggled reconciling my calling to speak of love and harmony with my private devotion to ancestral wisdom and African spirituality. But perhaps they are not at odds at all. Perhaps my ministry is not about choosing one over the other but being a bridge between them.
What if the Spirit asked me to show that love and peace also include the ancestors’ wisdom? Can the ocean and the altar coexist? Touching the water does not mean abandoning who I am — it means becoming more of my genuine self.
An Invitation for You
If you, too, have been rowing on the surface — afraid to touch the water — this is your reminder: Spirit is patient. You are not disappointing the Divine when you hesitate. The call will come again. And when you are ready, you’ll know it’s time to dip your hand into the current.
Maybe your “water” isn’t the ocean at all. Perhaps it’s a new path you’ve been resisting, a healing practice you’ve been avoiding, or a truth about yourself you’re afraid to accept. Whatever it is, the deep will keep calling.
And when you’re ready to trust, remember this: the waters that frighten you are also the waters that can carry you into freedom.
“For now, I keep rowing. But I know the day will come when I stop, reach down, and finally touch the water.”
Comments
Post a Comment